Friday, September 14, 2007

Sleeping through the night

Before moving to Arizona, we had Taylor on a pretty good schedule. Sleeping 10-11 hours a night with no interuptions. That lasted for about a week and then we moved. I think living here now 3 weeks, Taylor should be adjusted to his new enviornment. He's now 8 months old and I think he should be sleeping through the night. I asked the other ladies I hang out with if they child sleeps through the night and they said, "oh yes, my child has been sleeping throught the night for a few months." So I quickly asked them..."HOW DO YOU DO IT?!" Well, I found out it takes work and it's just not something that happens (to most children). Since I like my sleep, I decided to take their aproach of letting Taylor cry it out. He usually only wakes up once in the middle of the night, unless he's sick or teething. So 2 nights ago I gave it a shot. He woke up at 2:30 and I just let him scream. After a few minutes I went to check to see if he had anything wrong with him. He didn't. So, after about an hour and a half, he finally settled down and went to sleep (after me checking on him a couple of times and giving him a bottle...which I didn't want to do.) Last night was a little better. Yesterday I tried to feed him good 3 meals with bottles in between. I knew he wouldn't be hungry. He woke up at 5:30 and I just let him cry it out. After about a 1/2 hour/45 minutes, he stopped. Then, he woke up at 7:30 and I knew he wasn't ready to wake up. So, I gave him a bottle and I went back to sleep. He woke up at 9:30. I know a lot of you out there think your way is the right way to have your child sleep through the night. I am up for any suggestions as I formulate my "right way" of doing it.

3 comments:

Mom of four said...

Okay, you asked for suggestions, so here's mine. Take it or leave it, you won't hurt my feelings!

First, I think you know your baby better than anyone else. You spend more time with him than anyone. You know his personality, his preferences, his needs better than anyone on earth. And he was sent to you so that you could mother him the way he needs. So, I would suggest you do what your gut tells you is best for him.

Along those lines, does it feel right for him that he cries for up to hours at a time, alone at night, in his crib? Does your gut tell you to let him cry it out?

Or, do you have to convince yourself that what other moms and authors thought was right for their babies is also right for your baby?

I know, those questions sound loaded, but they are genuine.

My babies have gone through phases of sleeping really well, then switching back to waking up like newborns. Sometimes, I go to bed thinking, "I'm not getting those babies until 7:30 in the morning, no matter what!!" But then I hear them cry at 2:30 or 3:00, and my gut tells me that they need Mom. No, they're not hungry. No, their diapers aren't messy. But they have a real, genuine, serious need for me. That's what my gut tells me. So, despite being so tired and "sick of these crying kids!!!" I get up and tend them. That's what my gut tells me is right for them, is what they need.

This is controversial and everyone has their opinion. Here's mine: Babies sleep "through the night" when they are ready and no sooner. Babies are not supposed to sleep through the night at 6 weeks; they don't come with sleep programming. Parents can help babies get ready, in a sense, to sleep well by:
- Establishing a predictable, relaxing nighttime routine;
- Establishing a daytime routine including naps;
- Spending lots of time with baby and responding quickly to baby's needs during the day;
- Waiting to respond at night until baby really needs them; and
- When baby does need Mom, responding at night to baby's needs.

Steph and Ster, I know you'll take all the advice you get and do for Taylor what you decide he needs. He'll get the best care possible from you two! It is not easy being parents of little kids. But we can get through this hard time ... right?

One more thought: Who ever said parents deserve 8 hours of sleep a night?!

Jessica said...

Oh Steph I totally understand what you are saying. It seems I have my kids on a good sleeping schedule, then we go to Utah for a few weeks and we have to start at square one. I have to handle my kids in totally different ways when it comes to sleep. Isaac was such a hard baby(he had colic) so I had to just let him cry himself to sleep, because me holding him didn't comfort him at all, he would still cry. Seth, on the other hand has been a great sleeper. When he starts crying at night I know that he isn't feeling well, scared, or needs something. I will go and comfort him, and he usually will settle down after I do that. You just have to do what you feel is right for you and Taylor. Good luck!!

Ilene Strong said...

Steph, I agree with Marilee. Maybe 90 minutes of crying at night is too excessive. You have to decide what is best for Taylor and then have the courage to follow through with that. As a mother, sometimes we think we deserve certain things, but as a mother, we have to be willing to give that up for what is best for our children. You are a good mommy, I have seen you in action. I agree with Marilee, do what you think is best for Taylor instead of what everyone else who is not in the situation thinks.